Apologies for lack of reading material recently. I have become much busier over the last few weeks and every time I sat down to write something for you I decided either a sleep, food or an episode of suits was a better option. However, I do have some interesting thoughts to share with you so hopefully this will give you some insight into the last two weeks.
Why have I been busy? Over the last few weeks I have started back at university. I am in my final semester of Exercise Science at the Australian Catholic University in Melbourne. It is currently week 4 which means it is about time I open up the subject outlines and start on some assignments which are due this time next week. Yay. I have also started working with the Xavier College school rowing program. This season I am the strength and conditioning coach and also the 2nd 8 coach. At the moment as part of pre season training I work with a group of around 30 students 3 mornings a week and take them through a mixture of body weight and core stability exercises, an ergo session, a boxing session and also a game of ultimate frisbee once per week which they seem to enjoy. Over the last few weeks I have found it challenging turning up to inspire and instruct these kids, most particularly mornings when i was struggling emotionally with other aspects of my life. However, it has been important not to let the kids see this, and thus has provided a very useful distraction for me. This is similar to work i have been doing where I take school students on guided tours through the Victorian Institute of Sport, Along with the tour I want to show the school kids how positive and determined I am even after all the setbacks and leave them feeling extremely motivated to challenge themselves and to never give up chasing their dreams, showing this on the 'tough' days has taken some practice. I have also been busy training on the bike in the gym (I am getting close to completing my first road riding session). Attached is an update of the 30min bike sessions i have been completing. I am excited to see this chart in a few months time.
As this shows, physically I am progressing well and so far my legs are coping extremely well with the training. Other than some muscular aches and the neural pain that i have spoken about previously, I couldn't be happier with how they are feeling. However in regards to this, I have reached a realisation that I am all to familiar with which is the point where the excitement from being able to exercise post surgery has faded and you are left with a dreading feeling as you contemplate how much work needs to be done to return to an elite level and thinking about all the hours and time that I need to invest into this is a little confronting. Unfortunately for me it was only last year that I went through an identical rehabilitation post surgery in April, and the memories of what I put myself through from June-Novemeber last year is very fresh in my mind. And on that topic, following that training I managed to put myself in a good position and was able to win the national long distance time trial in december, so to consider doing anything different isn't really an option for me, as it seemed to work well for me last time. Just pray to the gods that once i build up my strength and fitness again this time nothing goes pear shaped. 'Touch wood' i am extremely confident the issue is behind me and i will be able to move forward and get back to doing what it is I so desperately want.
A few weeks ago i mentioned a cycle of emotion. Some of you will have already seen part of the following but i have added to it. For those of you new to my story, i encourage you to go back to the 21st July post to gain a full insight into where i was only one month ago which will also mean the following makes much more sense.
A CYCLE OF EMOTION
Happiness- doing what you love doing. Competing to a high standard. Living the dream, training with your mates and enjoying yourself and the lifestyle.
Denial- feeling your feet going numb during exercise but not fully admitting the seriousness of the situation.
Frustration/Anger- accepting that you are again unable to continue exercise/sport and you have to step back from your sporting goals
Despair - Wondering if you will ever be able to exercise again in your life, let alone compete in high level sport
Excitement - Being told by a surgeon that there is a major procedure that you have not yet had, and that this offers a high percentage chance of complete recovery. And the excitement of being in hospital and being on the road to recovery
Sadness/Frustration- Leaving hospital and beginning to comprehend and accept the long road ahead (this is not helped by having been through the same situation many times before, I think as i mentioned in a previous post that when I was 19 and having shoulder reconstructions I never thought about the actual road to recovery, it was more I just did it as that was what i needed to do)
Happiness- You are able to start exercising again, and initially you get some very rapid improvements which is very uplifting and makes you feel much better about yourself as you are on the road back.
A Reality Check- Where i am currently at now is a feeling of accepting the road back to a good performance. In some ways it was easier going through this last year when I just took it for what it was, However it only feels like yesterday that i was just starting back training prior to watching my ex team mates at the olympics last year. And the memories of what it took to return from surgery is all too fresh. And I am now accepting that to return back to where I want to be is going to take some time. And i will not be rowing super fast in my single scull or chasing 'strava KOM's' in the Dandenong ranges just yet..
However in finishing this up, I just want to explain in regards to my 'medical condition' of "popliteal artery entrapment". It is not like returning from a back injury, knee reconstruction or shoulder reconstruction where it is important to return as much strength as possible to the site which will minimise future problems. With my legs, there isn't anything I can do other than start progressing with training and hoping it is smooth sailing. The reason I mention this is I have heard a few whispers that the reason my condition returned at the beginning of this year was because i completed "too much cycling" or "trained too hard", I actually wish that I did actually have some control as to ensuring i do not run into issues again, however it not like this which is something that has taken me a little bit to get my head around. All i can do is get stuck into it and be positive that things will be as the surgeon and medical staff suggest and expect. Basically the only other option would be to exercise a few times a week like the general population, however this doesn't offer much in regards to competing again on the world stage. For those unfamiliar with the photos posted on the 5th July i suggest you go back and have a look, as I am of the belief now that how could i possible have any trouble down the track after removing those steaks from each of my legs.
Hopefully that makes sense, as I am now off to get into the gym to do some more bike (thinking time) and I actually plan on some swimming for the first time post op. The scars have finally closed over (only took 8 weeks) which means risk of infection has passed, it will be nice to get into the pool! Oh and i am also loving commuting on my new mountain bike. Won't be long now until you are reading about me riding up and (slowly) down the hills through the forrest behind Lorne on this bike.
Until next time, please keep reading as I love checking to see how many views my posts get. By seeing that over 600 people are now consistently viewing my story is very humbling for me, so please help support me by sharing 'Unsinkable' on social media with those around you. If i can inspire a just a small percentage of you then all the 'blogging' at this point in time is very worthwhile. All going well at the end of this there is the potential for a very cool story and to be able to follow my story as it progresses is the reward I want to offer you by subscribing to this blog now.
Cheers, John
It's probably hard for you to watch but what are your thoughts on the World Rowing Championships currently in South Korea?
ReplyDeleteHopefully you'll be there next year!